July 3, 2022

Three Methods to Deal with Criticism

I clicked on the message request from a stranger and commenced studying. My coronary heart sank on the assault of harsh phrases. I didn’t know the lady who despatched the message, however she hurled accusations at me about an article I’d written, judging my coronary heart and motives. She completed by suggesting I stop writing altogether.

The message arrived on the finish of an extended day. I used to be on deadline and exhausted, and I’d had a tense, emotional dialog with a pal solely hours earlier. Whereas the discuss with my pal had ended effectively, discouragement rumpled my spirit. This crucial letter now had me feeling defeated.

Poor rankings

Even in circumstances of useful suggestions or constructive criticism, I don’t assume any of us relish being informed our shortcomings. I would like others to assist me see my blind spots, however the course of is inevitably painful. Understandably, the unchecked and even unfair disapproval of others will be particularly brutal. (Can’t all of us simply get alongside?) This wasn’t the primary time I’ve skilled criticism, so listed here are three optimistic methods I’ve realized to cope with it.

Pay attention. When somebody delivers a crucial remark, I feel it’s useful to comprehend there may very well be reality in what they are saying. James 1:19 says, “Know this, my beloved brothers: let each particular person be fast to listen to, gradual to talk, gradual to anger.” These are phrases I search to reside out when somebody affords me suggestions.

I don’t must agree with their evaluation, however once I pay attention to know, I permit reality — whether or not a kernel or a boulder — to sink into my coronary heart. Proverbs 19:20-21 says, “Hearken to recommendation and settle for instruction, that you could be acquire knowledge sooner or later. Many are the plans within the thoughts of a person, however it’s the goal of the Lord that can stand.” God makes use of correction and at occasions criticism to make me clever and put together me for His functions.

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Invite God to go looking your coronary heart. After my tense dialog with my pal, I spent a while with the Lord, asking Him to divulge to me issues I’ll have completed to create relational pressure. In Psalm 139:23-24 David writes: “Search me, God, and know my coronary heart; take a look at me and know my anxious ideas. See if there may be any offensive means in me, and lead me in the best way eternal.”

At occasions, criticism could also be a sign that one thing is off with my coronary heart or motives. If I’m being accused of one thing, I can take that to God and invite His loving correction. It’s releasing to comprehend that I’m accountable to God and God alone. I will disappoint individuals — typically due to my sin and typically for causes past my management. However I don’t have to fret about making others glad. God is aware of my coronary heart, and as I search to please Him I’ll love others higher.

Transfer ahead. I used to be just lately speaking with a godly older girl about mentoring youth. “What do you do in the event that they reject what you must provide?” I requested.

“You aren’t accountable for one other particular person’s response,” she mentioned. “A adverse response doesn’t imply God received’t use you someplace else. He’ll convey the individuals who must pay attention; you simply want to inform the story.”

Jesus informed His disciples to shake the mud off their sandals if individuals refused to take heed to their message. I’ve wasted treasured time and vitality agonizing over somebody’s undeserved criticism of me. Rejection is a part of life, and typically the most effective plan of action is to shake off unwarranted critique and transfer ahead in grace — grace for your self and for the opposite particular person.

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My true id

Once I learn the cruel message from a stranger on a day I used to be already fighting discouragement, I acknowledged it for what it was — an assault from the enemy. I didn’t want to simply accept the condemnation it contained. Romans 8:1 tells me, “There’s now no condemnation for many who are in Christ.”

After studying it as soon as, I deleted the message and requested the Holy Spirit to remind me of what was true. Jesus loves me. I’m accepted by Him. He guides me, strengthens me and defends me. I’m His beloved daughter. God approves of me. And in the end, His opinion is the one one which issues.


Copyright 2022 Suzanne Gosselin. All rights reserved.